Eight Simple Rules for Dating My Daughters

Rules are important. Necessary. Maybe there are eight...there are probably more. They are simple. At first glance, you may think this blog is about the rules we have established and the standards we have set regarding individuals who may be interested in our daughter(s). No. That area has already clearly been thoroughly covered by my daughter(s). Actually, this is the eight simple rules to date my daughter successfully. See, it is my observation that boys just don't get it. Or maybe they just don't get my daughters. (I say daughters because even though Kayla has not reached dating age yet, this appears to pertain to her, as well.)

I have observed in the past a pattern. I keep thinking that as the boys get older they will recognize the "rules" and adhere to them. No. I know this sounds nuts but I feel bad for the guys and I feel bad for my daughters too because they are disappointed that after just a brief conversation or two, the boys have already broken one of the rules and well....that is it for them..The thing is, my daughters don't even realize that they have these unspoken rules and the boys OBVIOUSLY don't either. How could they? They are not written...they're not even spoken, but they exist and if a boy ever wants to have a second date with one of the daughters,well, you gotta know the rules.

1. A clean mouth...I don't mean clean as in fresh breathe, ( although, I am sure that is a plus) I mean talk nice. I remember one day, my daughter coming home and saying she had met this really cute guy that was really nice. Well, next day, she overhears him talking with his buddies..and not very nicely...and that was it, she never so much as looked his way again.

2. Love your momma...A long time ago, I told my girls that you can always tell if a guy is a good guy by the way he treats his momma. Somehow, that has never been forgotten and if they see a guy disrespecting his mom, well, that's the end of that.

3. Missionary bound...sorry, but this is not negotiable. I have seen some really great guys mention they were still on the fence about serving and well, that was the end of that. Hayli won't even budge an inch on that...if you haven't been planning on serving a mission since um, let's say, you entered Sunbeams, it might not be necessary for you to read the rest of the rules.

4. Know your alphabet.... We have a saying in our house about getting from A to Z. Somehow, guys forget there is a whole alphabet out there. For instance, A is the interest my daughter may show a guy. All of a sudden, he wants to be at Z asking her to be his girlfriend and saying "I love you's" Big mistake. Huge. Following the alphabet is VERY important to my daughters and I believe they have yet to make it to Z, ever. If the boy made it to Z, he made it alone and that was probably the end of that. Don't forget about B,C,D,E, and so forth. My girls have yet to say I love you's and when they do, it will be a big deal.

5. Be patient...don't they say patience is a virtue? Well, you are going to need it in order to make it from A to Z.

6. Honesty is the best policy..it is. Really. It is an important one and a rule that I probably should have put as #1.

7. Where's the line?....You have to recognize it. Know where it is. You might have to look pretty hard 'cause it is fine. If you are over zealous...it's over. If you are not aggressive enough (obviously NOT in a physical way because then you wouldn't need these rules because my husband would kill you. Literally. Seriously.) She will think you aren't interested and move on. I mean, if you like my daughter, spend time with her , but not too much. Express your fondness, but not too much. Tell her how nice she looks,... that, you don't have to limit. But NEVER, EVER, send someone else to express your feelings for her. Not good... unless you are like in the 4th grade.

8. Friendly vs. Flirty....there is a difference. Friendly is good. It is great. Being flirty however,..with many girls, is a major turn-off to my girls. I know, it is just a normal thing in life, harmless..I understand that but nevertheless, if you are a big flirt, it just ain't gonna happen.

Now, my girls are probably going to kill me if they ever read this but I am being honest here. They have these rules that they don't even realize they have. I am not saying it is a bad thing, at all. It is good to have standards and high ones at that. But how can the poor guys follow the rules when they don't know what they are?
It is just as well because once they know the rules, they have to fill out my husband's application.."Application For Dating My Daughters". Not to mention the interview process. Grueling. Who do you feel more sorry for, the guys or my daughters?