I'm a Grandma!

Who would've thought it would come so soon? I thought I had at least 7,8 more years. Well, here I am a Grandma at age 35! Kayla brought home her baby boy, Brayden, on Friday afternoon. He weighs approximately 10 pounds, is about 21 inches long, and looks somewhat asian. Okay, it is really a computer doll, who looks and acts VERY similar to a real baby. Poor girl, she only got a few hours sleep last night. Brayden, or as she lovingly referred to him this morning, "stupid baby", woke her up crying three or four times last night. He was having a bad night. He slept great the night before but you know babies...sleep is not a guarantee. We went to the mall yesterday, normally Kayla's favorite spot, when not even an hour into the trip, she is begging to go home. The baby is heavy, cries, and needs regular diaper changes...as if?? So, home we went so she could concentrate on meeting Brayden's needs. She is going to be such a good mom...when ever Brayden cries she jumps right up, grabs the diaper bag and says something like. "shut-up baby, or uggghh, stop your crying, already" Yeah, a real mommy dearest. It is quite appalling actually, since 'shut-up' is not something I say or have EVER said to her. But in all fairness, she is sick with an ear ache and her throat hurts...and it's just a computer baby doll, with no feelings, no ability to actually hear what she is saying. Well, it's a good thing! I expect better treatment for my grandchildren.

Thievery 101

Thievery 101
1. If you decide to go a house at 3AM and break into some vehicles, it might be a good idea to avoid homes with motion security lights that will stay on as long as your standing there...(or hunched over digging for some goods in the console of vehicle)
2. You might want to choose another house if by chance there is a two-person deer stand being assembled in the driveway...this is usually a clue that the homeowner MAY own guns AND know how to use them!
3. When choosing a getaway vehicle...if you can't manage to get one of the homeowners, you might want to consider something with a little more get-up-and-go than a baby blue/mint green girl's Schwinn. Although undeniably adorable, a little unthieve-like and not too quick out the gate.
4. When homeowner comes out and fires a shotgun, (because you were stupid enough to ignore the bright security spotlight on you and parked your speedy bikemobile in plain sight, you should probably drop the 4 pounds of pennies and nickles you managed to swipe from vehicles..it tends to slow down your pace and could be somewhat noisy.
5. If you have already been caught in the past and are on probation, maybe find something better to do at the 3 in the morning.

Homeowner 101..
1. LOCK ALL YOUR CAR DOORS!